" Sometimes, you need to step outside, get some air, and remind yourself of who you are and where you want to be. "
This will be one of my more personal posts. Just a heads up. As of late.. I find myself back at square one again. There's so much that makes me want to stay, but at the same time.. the things that make me want to leave is on par. Almost. It's a constant struggle back and forth. I absolutely hate it. Half the time I find myself questioning as to what I'm doing here. What I initially thought was a pretty damn clear sign of where I should be, now lies in total uncertainty. I wish I could just pack up and leave. Travel the world, meet cool people, and not have any obligations. But that's not realistic at all. Not right now anyways. I miss the adventures, the moments that take my breath away, and just spending some quality time with my family and friends. I feel completely swamped with everything, that I can't breathe. I obviously do a pretty damn good job of not showing it.. just because I don't think it's something to be shown. But I guess at some point, I just need a shoulder or two to lean on amidst all of this. Thanks to the few who have been there, y'all know who you are. Also.. I think I might have jumped into things too quickly, only to realize again that slowing down is really a better path. I have built walls to guard my heart, that only so few can hurdle across. I feel like I need to step back and reevaluate what I really want in life. Who I am.. Where I want to be.
On another note, I want to thank you. Thanks for everything you have have done as of late. The talks, walks, and good times. Thanks for being real with me. For introducing me to new things. For putting a smile on my face. For simply.. being you. You're a great friend, and I wouldn't change that for the world. ♥